Why do men like love at first sight?

It saves them a lot of time.

What did the fast tomato say to the slow tomato?
Ketchup.

A shotgun wedding is a case of wife or death.

9-12-10

A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "how much for a drink?"
Bartender says, "for you, no charge."

What hockey penalty requires a credit card?

Charging.

9-10-10

What's a ghost's favorite fruit?
Boo-berries!

9-9-10

Which fish make the best doctors?
Sturgeon

9-8-10

> Two peanuts walk into a rather rough bar, not looking for any trouble.
> Unfortunately, one was a salted.

9-7-10

Q. What does the Jewish Santa Claus say?

A. "Ho! Ho! Ho! Anybody wanna buy some toys?"

9--6-10

Bananas are my favorite fruit; they've got appeal.

sunday today.

Why was the chicken happy?
Everything was eggcellent.

sunday sunday, oops its saturday.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

9-3-10

Sorry for the late update today.

I saw a LeBaron pass me by today and got lost wondering: has a baron ever driven a LeBaron?

9/2/10

One Night my girlfriend and I were having trouble getting in the mood. She asked what she could do and when I suggested role reversal she told me to make her a sandwich and started masturbating in front of the computer.

20 followers wow!

I really get a sense of community here..  And seeing my follower's blogs under the mylinks part of their profile is a neat way to learn about them. 

So here's your joke today:

Why is it you can have a right hand man named Lefty but never a left hand man named Righty?

I always thought this was strange.

Here's that bad joke for you.

The Wide-Mouth Frog 

There was a wide-mouth frog that lived not too far from here. One day he 
decided to leave his pond and see the world.

He met a large, four-legged black and white animal with two horns, and 
said, "HELLO, I'M A WIDE-MOUTH FROG, WHAT ARE YOU, AND WHAT DO YOU EAT?"

"I'm a cow, and I eat grass"

"OH", said the wide-mouth frog, "IS THAT SO?"

The wide-mouthed frog then came to a huge bird with sharp talons and a 
curved beak. "HELLO, I'M A WIDE-MOUTH FROG, WHAT ARE YOU, AND WHAT DO YOU EAT?"

"I'm an eagle, and I eat little birds and mice"

"OH", said the wide-mouth frog, "IS THAT SO."

Next another large four-legged creature, standing on his hind legs, with 
sharp claws. "HELLO, I'M A WIDE-MOUTH FROG, WHAT ARE YOU, AND WHAT DO YOU EAT?"

"I'm a bear, and I eat honey"

"OH", said the wide-mouth frog, "IS THAT SO."

The wide-mouthed frog reached a river, and here was a long green slimy 
creature with huge jaws. "HELLO, I'M A WIDE-MOUTH FROG, WHAT ARE YOU, AND WHAT DO YOU EAT?"

"I'm an alligator and I eat wide-mouth frogs." 

"Oh", said the wide-mouth frog, "is that so."

Bad jokes

WELCOME TO MY NEW BLOG!  Oh boy this is the peak of internet stardom.  I was wondering...how important is grammar to you?  Whenever I am reading an erotic story or comic and find something like an improper use of your/you're I can't ever finish the story.  How weird is that?  Please comment on how you feel about this issue.